There’s an intriguing perspective to consider when reflecting on the past pandemic. A study from Harvard, dating back to 2000, suggests that women might have had a unique way of responding to stress compared to men during those challenging times. Instead of the classic “fight or flight” response, it was more like “tend and befriend”. Let’s delve into what this meant for women in leadership positions and how it might still be relevant to the challenges we faced.

The Fight or Flight vs. Tend and Befriend

Traditionally, stress has been associated with the “fight or flight” response – the idea that when faced with a threat, we either confront it head-on or run away from it. However, this study argues that this perspective was predominantly based on male-centric research, mainly involving male rats.

According to the Harvard researchers, women responded to stress differently during the pandemic. Instead of aggression or escape, they tended to nurture themselves and their loved ones. In times of stress, women formed closer bonds with groups that offered support and protection. This response was often referred to as “tend and befriend.”

Women in Leadership

Now, let’s bridge this concept to the world of business, a realm many of you have entered since the pandemic. While the business world might seem far removed from basic biology, it’s crucial to acknowledge the different experiences of women as they assumed leadership roles during those challenging times. Ignoring these differences would have been a mistake.

Women in leadership positions during the pandemic showcased a different approach. Instead of the aggressive tactics sometimes seen in male-dominated leadership, women leaders emphasized resilience and unity. They pulled together to ensure the well-being of their teams and businesses.

The Women Presidents’ Organization

A prime example of women coming together during the pandemic was the Women Presidents’ Organization, based in New York City. This organization, consisting of 2,000 members with businesses generating at least $1 million in revenue, saw its 140 chapter leaders meet regularly. Their conversations shifted from fear to action, focusing on how to move forward and support one another.

Members weren’t just offering emotional support but also practical assistance through free and discounted work for fellow members. This unity demonstrated the tend-and-befriend response in action.

Challenges for Women-Owned Businesses

Despite these positive trends, women-owned businesses faced unique challenges during the pandemic. They were often under-resourced and left out of initial waves of federal aid. Many of these businesses relied on contractors rather than employees, which made accessing aid more difficult.

Furthermore, women-owned businesses tend to be smaller, with less than one employee on average, as reported by the American Express State of Women-Owned Business Report. During economic downturns, smaller and younger businesses are more vulnerable, as noted by the Brookings Institute.

The Importance of Adaptation and Networking

In the uncertain economic aftermath of the pandemic, the ability to adapt quickly and leverage established networks remains invaluable. Building and maintaining relationships, which align with the tend-and-befriend response, can be a crucial factor in business survival and success.

Changing Perceptions and Insights

It’s intriguing that the Harvard research from two decades ago didn’t gain widespread attention, and the “fight or flight” response still dominates our understanding of stress. However, today, there is a growing focus on women in business, which may provide fresh insights into how women process stress.

Gennev’s Survey

Jill Angelo, CEO of Gennev, conducted a survey of 10,000 women during the pandemic, offering a fascinating perspective. Gennev is a telehealth service that assists women going through menopause. The survey revealed that women reported experiencing less anxiety compared to before, even though they still faced the same symptoms like fatigue, weight gain, anxiety, and hot flashes. These symptoms had a lower impact on their quality of life.

Could this be a sign of the positive impact of tend-and-befriend during the pandemic? It appears that women adapted the way they processed their feelings, potentially leading to a more positive outlook during those challenging times.

Conclusion

As you reflect on your post-college journey, it’s essential to recognize that people, especially women, responded to the stress of the past pandemic in diverse ways. The tend-and-befriend response, characterized by nurturing, support, and unity, was a unique approach that women often adopted during those challenging times. In the world of business and leadership, this response can be a valuable asset, promoting resilience and collective success, even as we move beyond the pandemic. Understanding and leveraging these responses may continue to be key to a brighter future for all.